Sitting in the afternoon light of my therapy office, I observe the faces of the couple across the coffee table. They are restricted, tense, and in pain. Hans* explains in a small voice that they have decided to end their marriage. His wife, Allison*, cries quietly...
The words we choose to express how we feel can undeniably impact how we relate to one another. In the words of the esteemed poet Rumi, “Raise your words, not your voice. It is the rain that grows flowers, not thunder.” As a marriage and family therapist, I see this...
When was the last time you looked at your wedding day photos? It’s truly a trip down memory lane — a moment to pause and remember where you started. These beautiful photos make two things very clear to me: We look like babies. Oh wow, we look so young. We had no idea...
We have all been hurt in our closest relationships, whether intentionally or unintentionally. It is a simple fact of life. Many of these injuries are shallow, and heal without much effort, like paper cuts. Sometimes, though, the injury is more serious, because it...
Have you ever suspected that someone you know may be having suicidal thoughts? Perhaps you've noticed your partner become uncharacteristically withdrawn, giving away prized possessions out-of-the-blue, or "getting affairs in order." Or maybe a friend or family member...
Now that COVID-19 vaccines are more widely available for adults, updated CDC guidelines, and mask mandates lifting, I’m beginning to see signs of distress and increased anxiety in couples regarding how to maintain closeness while reintegrating into their community....
I first heard the term “codependent” as a counseling student in graduate school. I remember working with one of my first clients, who was going through a painful breakup at the time. I can still see her sitting across from me in that cramped university office, tears...
If you've been hurt by your partner's infidelity, lying, or other type of relationship distress, forgiveness may feel like an insurmountable mountain. While Alexander Pope said, "To err is human; to forgive, divine," it's important to note that forgiveness is a...