Although a significant part of society embraces emotional expression, some still believe men should embody stoicism and suppress their emotions. However, research shows that developing EQ (emotional intelligence) is crucial for self-awareness and building healthier...
Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy
Is Your Partner a Pursuer or Withdrawer? Why Does It Matter?
A loving partnership is one of the most valuable things in life. Being able to turn to and depend on our partner creates deep joy, shelter, and protection through life's challenges. But no matter how secure our relationship is, we all experience periods of...
What is Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)?
You may have encountered EFT or Emotionally Focused Therapy if you have researched therapy types. This well-known approach is based on John Bowlby's attachment research from more than 50 years ago. Bowlby found that humans and higher primate animals appeared to have...
Therapy 101: What You Need to Know About Attachment
What is attachment? If you’ve ever Googled questions related to love, romance, or parenting, you might have come across the term “attachment.” You may have seen books on attachment at the library or even encountered the term in therapy. While the concept of attachment...
Separating Gracefully: How Couples Counseling Can Help
Sitting in the afternoon light of my therapy office, I observe the faces of the couple across the coffee table. They are restricted, tense, and in pain. Hans* explains in a small voice that they have decided to end the relationship. His wife, Mary*, cries quietly...
Have You Caused an Attachment Injury? Here’s How to Work Through It
We have all been hurt in our closest relationships, whether intentionally or unintentionally. It is a simple fact of life. Many of these injuries are shallow, and heal without much effort, like paper cuts. Sometimes, though, the injury is more serious, because it...
The Communication Iceberg: Diving Below the Waterline
Couples Therapy Session - Scenario Suzanne and Eddie* came to couples counseling seeking support to work through a painful event that occurred a year ago with the arrival of their first child. The event has caused a lot of fighting between them, and they have not been...
Do You Need a Couples Intensive?
If your friends ask, you say, “Everything is great...really...it’s good.” However, you know that isn’t entirely true, your relationship is “fine.” It’s not great and it’s definitely not how you’d like it to be, but it’s not on-the-brink of collapse. But you’re not...