Welcome to the third post in our series, Therapist Resource Roundup. Each quarter, we share a list of resources focused on a different theme our therapists often work through with clients. Every roundup will feature books, articles, videos, and podcasts that our therapists recommend for the topic at hand. These resources can help set you on a positive path, whether in a crisis or seeking to supplement your work in therapy.
Being in a relationship is a lot of work. The myth is that if the relationship is “right,” it should come easily or naturally. Yet, relationship health takes dedication, work, and practice like any other worthwhile endeavor. And while relationships do not come with instruction manuals, you don’t have to go through a relationship blindly.
We’ve narrowed down some of the best therapist-approved books, podcasts, newsletters, and retreats to help you and your partner strengthen your relationship — whether you’re currently in couples therapy or exploring resources on your own. The resource list below includes everything from tips on spicing up the passion in your relationship to a dedicated workshop just for you and your partner. Check out the resources below that will inspire you and your partner to keep growing together.
7 therapist-recommended relationship resources at a glance:
- Book: Wired for Love — Dr. Stan Tatkin
- Book: Eight Dates — Drs. John and Julie Gottman
- Newsletter: Marriage Minute — The Gottman Institute (free)
- Podcast: Small Things Often — The Gottman Institute
- Retreat: Couples Intensive
- Podcast: Where Should We Begin — Esther Perel
- Game: Where Should We Begin: A Game of Stories — Esther Perel
Book: Wired for Love: How Understanding Your Partner’s Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship by Dr. Stan Tatkin
This resource is most helpful for couples who…
- Struggle with communication around emotionally-charged issues
- Have a hard time feeling emotionally connected
- Want to understand how they get triggered and stuck in patterns of disconnection
Top takeaways from therapist H.M. Humphrey…
“Wired For Love” is an easy read full of helpful information about attachment patterns — all based on research! The author uses helpful metaphors to explain how some people are avoidant, others are anxious in relationships, and others feel generally secure with each other. He explores how these tendencies can lead to unproductive patterns that push partners apart, creating an experience of disappointment, loneliness, and disconnection. He also explores how we can get unstuck from those patterns and reconnect with our partner. This book is a great read to learn more about your partner, yourself, and your relationship.
If attachment patterns are something you’d like to explore further, our post on anxious attachment resources offers additional insights.
Book: Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime by Drs. John and Julie Gottman
This resource is most helpful for…
Couples looking to enhance their relationship together through a fun format
Top takeaways from therapist Dr. George Bitar…
This book provides a practical way to connect with your partner around specific topics: trust and commitment, money, conflict, sex and intimacy, spirituality, fun and adventure, and family. This book allows couples to practice some of the core Gottman tools within a “date night” framework. Each person should read the chapter and questions before the designated date night. Then, when the couple comes together during date night, they can deepen the conversation through their responses.
For couples who find conflict one of the harder topics to navigate together, our post on how conflict can actually strengthen your connection offers a therapist-led framework for those conversations.
Our Book Club for Couples is a weekly therapist-led experience that guides you and your partner Grow your connection,
one page at a time.
through insightful reads, reflection prompts,
and connection-building conversations.
Newsletter: Marriage Minute by The Gottman Institute
This resource is most helpful for…
This newsletter is helpful to both married and unmarried couples. Marriage Minute is ideal for couples looking for regular, reputable, and easily digestible tips to enhance their relationship health.
Top takeaways from therapist Kelsee White
Marriage Minute is an e-mail-based subscription relationship tool presented by The Gottman Institute (TGI). TGI is a web-based platform that shares the ground-breaking research of relationship experts Drs. John and Julie Gottman. The subscription includes twice-weekly emails with articles, relationship tips, strategies, and activities. Marriage Minute is a free resource that helps you and your partner learn meaningful ways to connect, communicate, manage conflict, and beyond. This resource is excellent for busy couples who may not have enough time to delve into a good book or regularly listen to a podcast. You will get digestible information you and your partner can discuss and try to implement into your daily lives. It’s a quick read you can enjoy over coffee or on your lunch break when you scroll your email.
Podcast: Small Things Often by The Gottman Institute
This resource is most helpful for…
This podcast is fantastic for couples who want to reconnect. The Small Things Often podcast has short episodes with valuable tips.
Top takeaways from therapist Danae Kauffman
The Small Things Often podcast is 5 minutes or less and offers insights into specific areas of relationships like expectations, needs, culture, and more. The podcast uses brief, potent relationship wisdom that encourages couples to make small changes often. Whether you have 5 or 20 minutes, this podcast can enrich your relationship.
Retreat Experience: 2-Day Couples Intensive
This resource is most helpful for…
This experience is designed for couples who are motivated and ready to do focused work together. If your relationship feels stuck in a pattern you can’t seem to break on your own, a Couples Intensive offers a powerful reset. It is also an excellent fit for couples in a high-stress season, navigating a breach of trust, or who want to make real progress without the pace of weekly sessions
Top takeaways from therapist and workshop presenter Dr. Faith Drew…
While I’ll acknowledge that I’m not a neutral party here, our team at CCT offers couples intensives, and I genuinely believe in what this format does. A couples intensive offers the focused, condensed structure that weekly therapy often can’t: uninterrupted time to move through the layers.
Every intensive begins with a Gottman Connect assessment — so we understand your relationship’s specific landscape before we begin — and each couple leaves with a personalized tool kit and a plan for what comes next.
If you’re looking for the fastest way to get real traction, this is what I’d recommend.
Couples intensives are private, extended-format therapy sessions designed to help you and your partner break through stuck patterns and reconnect — fast.One weekend. Deep work.
Real change.
Podcast: Where Should We Begin by Esther Perel
This resource is most helpful for…
Couples who are interested in relationship stories and enjoy listening to couples who experience similar challenges
Top takeaways from therapist Ali Flowers…
Esther Perel often has an interesting take for each couple, looking below the surface of the issue to find the deeper meaning. This podcast can give much hope to couples who are struggling — offering a reminder that struggle is part of nearly every relationship. There’s a wide variety of diversity on this podcast that can speak to so many others. As you listen, you get a front row seat to how Esther works intimately with a couple. Perel unfolds each couple’s unique story, searching for understanding and clarity within their relationship. Listening and identifying with these stories can help couples feel less stuck and more hopeful.
Game: Where Should We Begin – A Game of Stories by Esther Perel
This resource is most helpful for…
Couples looking to reconnect and learn something new about each other.
Top takeaways from therapist Ali Flowers…
Where Should We Begin (the game) allows couples to share insights about themselves that are rarely shared. The game encourages storytelling to give their partner a richer understanding of their experience. Some cards ask for a short answer to a question, while other “storytelling” cards ask to share an experience or memory. The questions are engaging and thought-provoking — an excellent start or end to any date night.
Looking for more resources? Find a therapist.
Your relationship might be the most important investment you make. The health of your relationship requires consistent attention, connection, and improvement. While relationships don’t come with instructions, many tools can help guide you and your partner. As therapists, we work with our clients to understand their history and what has influenced their beliefs and behaviors in their relationships. We can help you chart a course that will feel honest and enjoyable so you both can relish a long-lasting and meaningful relationship.